Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Ugly Has A Face

Worry about robbery at days, and burglary at nights in your house? Worry about unwelcome or over-stayed guests?

Don't worry.

Just get Pabst in your house.


Heck, it could even scare your annoying kids out of the house and give you some peace and quiet.


Friday, June 26, 2009

Michael Jackson Dies

King Of Pop

Stays Forever

Michael Jackson Dies Aged 50

His Music Lives On!


Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Oh Shit!


Monday, June 22, 2009

4 in 1

No. It's not a new kind of instant coffee.


You're blog-hopping via Blogexplosion, earning credit to get traffic to your blog. Traffic is good - more readers.

One down!

As the page loads, the title catches your eyes. You read the first paragraph, then the second, third ... Boy, what a good read. That's a nice blog! Another blog added to your favourite to enhance your pleasure in future online activities. That's good.

Two down!!

After you've finished the post, you scroll around the blog, and you notice this -

Adgitize your web site.

Yipee! You yell out in delight. Happily you click on one of the ad. There - money earned.

Three down!!!

Finished? Common sense tell you otherwise. 9 out of 10, if there's one Adgitize button smacked in the blog, the Entrecard button should be somewhere around too.


Your targeted click for Entrecard down by one.

Four down!!!!

Now, that's four birds in one shot.



Saturday, June 20, 2009

Happy Father Day!

From a father to all fathers -

Happy Father's Day!

* hope your family got something planned.


Thursday, June 18, 2009

Can I Borrow $25?

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'

DAD: 'Yeah sure, what it is?'

SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'

DAD (angry): 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?'

SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'

DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'

SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.

SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'

The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.'

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think:

Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25 and he really didn't ask for money very often The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.

'Are you asleep, son?' He asked.

'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.

'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you asked for.'

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.

The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.

The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the father grumbled.

'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.

'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.'


Monday, June 15, 2009

Where's Grandpa?

Hey, where's Grandpa Fat?


Friday, June 12, 2009

Not Today!!

He gave a sigh of relief as he pulled up his zip behind the tree. Just as he's about to turn and return to the camping site, he froze. The urge to pee again came rushing back into his system. His pupils dilated to the max, his hairs were standing straight up, every strand of them. Luckily, amid his panic, he was still able to think. He moved slowly, just as slow as the big cat was approaching him.

Gosh, it's the first time he saw a tiger without a cage in sight. The size of the cat was enough to make him pee in panic, and the fact that it was walking towards him could have easily made him do more.than just pee.

But he knew he hadn't had time to do neither.

He started walking, as did the tiger. He then walked faster, as did the tiger. He began to run, as did the tiger.

Knowing it would be dangerous to run back to the camp site, he headed towards the river 30 feet from him. He was thankful that he's still able to think coolly in a life threatening situation like this.

He knew he wouldn't be able to outrun the big cat. He chose the shortest direct route possible, splitting tall grasses and jumping over rocks.

Finally, just as the tiger was 8 feet behind him, he leaped with all his might as far into the river as possible.

As he was hanging in the air, he gave out a shout, "Not today, you furry bastard!!"

When he dived into the water, he felt the vibration of another splash behind him.

As he turned towards the source of the vibration in the water - "F**k!!"


Thursday, June 11, 2009

How A Marriage Works!

A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies

So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.'

'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife.

'I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I' m going to have a beer.'

The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?'

She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India ,etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar....you know.....they have frozen glasses...'

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying,

'You want a frozen glass, puppy face?'

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the Bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'

You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.

'But my sweet honey... At the bar... You know....there's swearing, d irty words and all that...'

'You want dirty words, Dickhead? Drink your fucking beer in your Goddamn frozen mug and eat your fucking snacks, because you are Married now, and you aren't going anywhere! Got it, Asshole?'

.......... and, they lived happily ever after.

Now, isn't that a sweet story?!!


Sunday, June 7, 2009

How To Add A Search Box For Your Blog

Simple - add the Search Box as a gadget in the "Layout" tab of the Blogger dashboard. It's the latest addition to the gadget list. You have the option to search:-

1. your blog
2. the pages you've linked to
3. the Web


Saturday, June 6, 2009

You Know You're Getting Old

... when it took you one day to realize the humour of your reader's comment. Or maybe I'm just simply slow.


Friday, June 5, 2009

License To Chill

Fancy having your tongue licking all over a half-naked Daniel Craig's muscled body?

Wonder when will they get the Halle Berry's version out?


Thursday, June 4, 2009

The Greatest Cause Of Injuries

At the stubborn age of 40+, the greatest cause of injuries would be ...


Monday, June 1, 2009

Guess What?

After all the hypes, Susan Boyle, the YouTube-made-famous singing sensation, didn't win Britain's Got Talent after all. The hypes that made her famous in the first place probably made her lost the final too.

The competition was won by a group of young dancers.

The Diversity --

The singer came in second with a solid performance.