Lines that would make no freaking sense twenty-odd years ago:
1. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection ... again.
2. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? **** it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
3. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
4. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
5. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
It started with taking the knife for you, then the bullet, and occasionally throwing in front of the bus or train will also work. As love gets greater, so has the sacrifice - it finally reaches the level of a grenade.
You know, sooner or later, somebody will make first few words rhyme, put a beat into it, and come out with a top 20 song.
Although, what good would it do if they were detonated anyway, and everyone dies?
The wife was cooking in the kitchen. The husband stood beside her and was yapping away, "Slow down! Careful! The fire is too big, you will over-fry the fish. There is too much oil. You need to flip the fish over sooner. Blah, blah, blah, blah ..."
Frustrated, the wife yelled out, "Shut up! I know how to cook!"
Calmly, the husband replied, "Oh, I know. I just want you to know how I feel when I'm driving with you sitting next to me."